When I first became a mom, I knew there would eventually come a time when I would have to discipline my son. But I didn't know that my faith would fit into the discussion of how I did so.

I stand firm in my faith and remember one day at church when my son was misbehaving. My uncle told me: "The Bible says to spank your child!" I looked at him inquiringly and looked up the scripture he gave me.

He who spares his rod [of discipline] hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines diligently and punishes him early.


Proverbs 13:24 AMP

Basically, if you don't correct your children then you don't love them. If you love them, then you will discipline them quickly.

Do I remember my punishments? Some of them, yes. Did they traumatize me? Absolutely not! I don't believe every punishment warrants a spanking.

Here are five tips on disciplining your children from Dr. Phil that hold up and don't require corporal punishment.

  • 1

    Calm parents make a calm child

    Parents should be in agreement on their disciplinary plan with their children. If the parents aren't on the same page, the kids can sense that. Some kids even use it to their advantage.

  • 2

    Be committed

    Do what you say you're going to do. Don't make empty threats to your children. Otherwise, they will keep acting out until the punishment comes.

  • 3

    What does your child value?

    Take away something your child values, like a favorite toy or play time. Always be consistent!


  • 4

    Don't be the loser

    A child misses out on the opportunity to learn an important lesson if you let them "win" a confrontation. Your children need to learn right from wrong, and they learn that from their parents.

  • 5

    Deal with your own frustrations first

    Ask yourself: is the crime worth the punishment, or am I using this as an opportunity to throw my own temper tantrum? Does the punishment you give depend on your mood? Sometimes when you're angry, your mood can be out of control, causing you to also lose control. Stay calm and in control of the situation, always.

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