Whoever decided a book about butts and farts shouldn't be on library shelves is never invited to any party of mine.

Not only are they no fun, but the library should be free from censorship, especially over something so silly. I hope whatever petty Karen complained about this gets crop-dusted every day until their attitude improves.

Luckily, a Texas 5th Circuit Court of Appeals judge agrees with me (about the book censorship, not necessarily the crop dusting).


The "controversial" book, I Need A New Butttells the story of a boy who discovers his butt has a crack in it, and goes on a mission to find a new one. Is that ridiculous? Absolutely. But any age-appropriate book that makes a child enjoy reading deserves shelf space.

The whole debacle began when some parents complained about the book in the Llano County public library system, leading local officials to instruct the library director to remove I Need A New Butt and some other titles off shelves. The topics ranged from a farting leprechaun to books about the much more serious history of racism in the U.S.

Other library patrons sued, claiming they violated First Amendment rights by removing the books. The Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals agreed and ordered the library to return the books to shelves. Books can be discarded for damage, wear, and low circulation, but farts are not a good enough reason to rid the library of a book.

This ruling was about public libraries, but Texas has become notorious for banning books inside school districts. However, this ruling could have implications for those subjective bans as well.

Here's hoping the First Amendment, and more common sense in general, keep seeing wins here in the Lone Star State.

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